SICK AS A DOG
February 8, 2015

I’ve been completely MIA for the past week. Cole and I were both diagnosed with the dreaded Influenza A last Monday and have been holed up together in the house ever since. We missed a week of the outside world. My husband left at dawn on Thursday morning for an annual winter camping trip he does with a group of guys, leaving Cole and I on our own in our misery.

The first few days were the roughest, though around day four the flu seemed to take a turn and behaved more like a cold. The aches were replaced by coughing and snot. and the high fever (Cole’s neared 104 at one point…mine only just butted 103) dropped so that it hovered around 100-101 until it finally left us both yesterday. We were told we would be contagious until we were fever free for 24 hours…Which is only just barely now. I’m grateful my husband left when he did, before he too became stricken with this misery.

Cole was a trooper. We did very little for the first days. Even just carrying him (80+ lbs), from one room to another made me tired so we’d move and rest, a lot. We read, watched too much TV…marathons of Master Chef Jr. and About A Boy, and lots of cooking shows…When we started feeling more human, we worked on his science fair project, putting the final touches on the presentation board and his binder. We chatted with anyone who called us…mostly my mom calling daily to check in on us, and we napped.

Friday we ventured out for a quick hour to have his glasses repaired (a little accident left them with one lens popped out and one arm bent upward), and to stock up a few supplies from Target. It felt good to be out and about but we were both exhausted by the venture.

My mom came to visit us yesterday, which turned out to be the perfect diversion. I snuck out for a quick trip to Trader Joe’s for some much needed staples and then the three of us hung out watching random cooking shows and dozing. My mom and Luna crashed out together on one couch, Cole in his Chill Chair, and me on the other couch, all of us contentedly napping under blankets while the misty rain fell in the afternoon. Cole and I both appreciated having someone new to chat with and Luna loved having someone new to cuddle up with.

Today we both finally felt like the flu has left the building. Cole slept really peacefully last night and woke up in a great mood. I spent the morning getting the house in order and doing some cooking for the week, and my husband came home around noon so we had some family time too. I think we are all looking forward to a bright shiny new week. I’m definitely ready to put this past one behind me, although I am going to miss Cole when I am at work. It’s not often that we have such an extensive one on one together.

DON’T WORRY BABY
February 2, 2015

Cole and I both apparently have the flu…influenza A. He has it much worse than I do. It came out of nowhere and hit him like a ton a bricks. He was seemingly perfectly fine Saturday and woke up Sunday with some aches and then raging fever. Now his head is full of flu, he’s contending with post-nasal drip (which is hard for him and ends up upsetting his stomach too) and a very stuffy head. Fortunately, it’s not settled in his lungs and his blood oxygen is good.

We both started Tamiflu this evening…What fun. Not exactly high on my list of fun mother-son activities!

The worst part for me is how miserable he is. He can’t articulate exactly what feels badly. I think his throat may be sore, but he doesn’t respond with any definitive affirmation. He hasn’t smiled once today…He’s a kid who smiles a lot and whose smiles mean things beyond simple joy. Nary a grin or even half smile. today It’s bad when there’s nothing worth smiling about (even when I bumped my head in the car which usually elicits huge belly laughs!). (I sometimes bump my head pushing his wheelchair up the back ramp into the car…I don’t bend down quite enough and wham!).

Times like this are when I feel most helpless. I can take care of the symptoms I am aware of and do my best to make him feel comfortable but without any feedback it’s hard to know if all of the needs are tended to. It’s hard to know if there’s more I can be doing or something special he wants from me. I’m honestly not sure he always knows exactly what hurts or what’s just some of his normal ache. He’s so used to the tire comes from working hard in P.E. and then standing in one or two classes. He used to the soreness in his hips that comes from sitting in a wheelchair all day. I’m certain he could differentiate the ache that comes from this flu from his everyday aches.

But I don’t know…which is where the helpless feeling comes in. I can only assume things and try to help his doctor assume things better than I am. I wish I could simply him tight and wait out the flu with him and that it would be enough to comfort him and make him feel better. But it doesn’t…